Parenting is Heart Work

Tom and I went to a parenting seminar this weekend. It was called "Parenting is Heart Work" from the people at BiblicalParenting.org. It happened to be at our old church so it was fun to see some old faces while still retaining some of the anonymity of "we're having problems disciplining our kid."

Usually at these seminars I have to get over some predispositions, like how the seminar speakers are always Caucasian and there always books and resources to sell. But I felt such a sense of desparation (especially my rather embarassing yelling and jumping fit with Tobey last Thursday) that I was willing to look past the seminar stereotype and just be really eager to hear ANYTHING that will help us with Tobey.

In fact, I got over the seminar stereotype so much that Tom and I bought this 8 CD/8 workbook series. I felt a little ridiculous buying this box of stuff but after a quick chat with the speaker, I found that it was the right resource for the problems we're having with Tobey's dawdling and not listening. We don't really have a set timeline for how or when to finish them but we started tonight. Will post my notes (which may or may not be comprehensible without listening to the CD) as we go through the series.

As we were listening tonight, I thought about SueAnn, a fellow MTO mom that I don't know real well, but I feel like is my fellow-mom-struggling-with-yelling (or at least the one mom who has admitted to it publicly like me). I know she does her share of reading and finding parent resources but if this helps me curb my yelling, then I'm definitely sharing it with her. I've been yell-free for just 3 days ever since the seminar. I feel a little more focused now. Before, trying to curb my yelling was just a difficult exercise in self-control, an exercise that I was failing at miserably. But now, when I try not to yell, it's because I have concrete things in my brain that I'm working on in trying to get Tobey to behave.

I guess on a lighter note, I started scribbling notes with pencil and paper as we started the CD, only to realize Tom was tapping away on his laptop. "Hey, I wanna take notes on the laptop", was my response and the two of us sat there listening to the CD, tapping away on our respective laptops. I felt a bit like Enoch & Tania. ;-)