Timeouts work wonders

When there's anger and impatience, sometimes a timeout is all that is needed. To cool down. To be distracted. To just get away from the situation and think about what you just did.

And so the other night Tom gave me a Mommy timeout. It was Friday night and I was putting Tobey down. I figured it would be okay putting him down but apparently not. After not just a day, but a week, of banging my head against the wall with Tobey -- potty training and other toddlerisms -- when he dawdled and whined while brushing teeth, I got huffy with him. Convinced he was swallowing his toothpaste instead of spitting, just to annoy me, I was a bit whiny myself. "Why don't you just spit?" "I know you know how to spit, just spit." "Stop swallowing your toothpaste." "Are you doing this to annoy me?" It was then that Tom intervened and said maybe I should take a break. It was like being on a sports team (well, not that I would know) and you're getting tired so the coach pulls you out of the game. Spoiled NBA players might complain about being taken out, but although I wished that I could hold it together without being taken out, I knew I had crossed the line. While it was embarassing to be called on it, I welcomed the break.

So my distraction was washing dishes. During that 15 min. (not the minute per age year rule which is good because I would have been there forever), I got to do thinking. Why can't I control my anger? What is it about toddlerhood that is driving me nutty? Why can't I just let little things slip -- why must I fight every battle? It was then also that I knew I needed to apologize and tell him that Mommy wasn't being nice at all.

Thank goodness for the resilience and forgiveness of toddlers. I just hope my words didn't make any permanent dents into his memory. The timeout helped me. Now only if they worked as well on Tobey.