Good sleepers
The more I hear about friends' kids' sleeping issues, the more I thank God that we have two good sleepers. Not to make anyone feel bad if they are still struggling with kids' sleep. But look how much I struggle with my patience and temper with the kids...and this is when I do get sleep!
Ran into Emily today and Andrew is still having sleeping issues (he turns 2 in May, I believe...oh, same age as Anna who is just starting to get more consistent in her naps and sleeping through the night). She said that she wasn't coldhearted enough to let her kid cry in the beginning but now admittedly it's hard for them to get Andrew to sleep well at night.
I wasn't sure whether to take offense or to be proud that I was coldhearted enough to let the kids cry early on. I evangelize Dr. Moore's "one minute per week" rule to every mom who asks how I get the kids to sleep through but I haven't heard back from many takers yet. And I've read about books that say there are ways to get your kid to be a good sleeper without crying and that's great. But what worked for us was a little crying for our kids but now they both go down peacefully without crying (about 90% of the time for Eli -- not bad for 5 months!).
Some of my recent proud moments on the kids' sleeping:
- Eli can fall asleep by himself sans crying. I cue him with the same music box at naps (nothing for bedtime) and walk out of the room. Our friends and family say, "Wow, that's it?" when we walk back out of the room 1 minute after we say we're putting Eli down.
- Eli sleeps through the night 9PM to at least 8AM if he's on a full tummy, thanks to a Dr. Moore's permission to put him down on his tummy at night (strong neck). He's been doing this since about 2 months.
- Tobey has now twice in the past month woken up earlier than usual (5:30-6AM). Out of my own selfishness to want more sleep, I gave him a sympathetic but quiet talk about how the sun, Eli, Daddy, everyone is still sleeping and that he needs to go back to sleep. And he did!
- During Dennis & Denise's visit, we wanted Tobey to nap in the car so that he'd be well-rested and non-cranky for our midday visits to various venues. Although it was early for his usual nap (11AM), he also had been waking up early because of the girls so we figured he was tired. But he kept singing and talking and looking out the window. So we said that he needed to take a nap, close his eyes, put his head back and sleep like Mommy (I was a willing example). On the way down to Monterey, he was out within 5-10 minutes. Same with the SF Zoo.
- Lately, Tobey's been able to sleep through Eli's waking up cries during naptime, provided I don't let Eli go on for too long.
It's really nice to have two good sleepers. It's something we can depend on for a structured day and a peaceful evening.
posted by Ang @ 3:19 PM
2 Comments:
*sigh* Just had to put in a comment.... sleep is definitely passionate issue that I've been fighting ever since audrey was born. She is still NOT sleeping through the night at almost 2 and there are definitely many days when I'm ready to go crazy. She doesn't even go down for her naps very easily (cries for 10-40 minutes and falls asleep on the floor next to the door trying to get out). I don't know if it is because we've not fully done crying it out. Maybe it is the minute a week rule that we never tried. We've always responded immediately when she cries. It is only at about 16 months that we let her cry between us when she wakes at night..... really out of desperation at that point. Right now, I'm just going with the flow and being thankful for that 3 hour chunks that I get at night. It was much worse only half a year ago (half an hour to 1 hour chunks). Definitely very envious of your boys' sleep habits!
Everyone used to give me the dirty look when i tell them that i let my kids "cry themselves to sleep" but these same mom with 2-3 year old kids are still sleep deprived. with aidan and nally, i know that this same method can work differently with different temperaments. it only takes nally 5 minutes, but aidan took 3 nights and 2 hours ( of fussing ). i am a little softer on the boy, but at the end of the day, the same formula works. being "cold hearted " is a good "skill" to have even now with a 3.5 year old. with bedtime pop-ups and negotiations, the battle never ends. i went to a sleep lecture once and there were parents there with kids up to 5 years old! it was positively terrifying! But the formula was still the same -- learning to self soothe.
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